Friday, January 8, 2010

Being back in West Orange, New Jersey

It's been a bit odd adjusting. Flying into Newark, surrounded by lights, I thought.. where's the green? where's the forests? the mountains? is there anything here that isn't man made? To much disappointment, I already knew the answer. It was a city... industry and residences. My heart immediately sank. Why was I coming back to this? It seemed so ludicrous.Crisp, chilling air... I seemed to instantaneously adjust to it. The Newark air... well it didn't really bother me.

It's funny being back in New Jersey... West Orange, my home town... I've spent 26 years here before suddenly (and I mean suddenly) picking up and moving to Hawaii. I landed this past Thursday, greeted by my dad at the airport. It was good to see him. The ride home comforting and a bit chatty about what's been going on... his financial endaveours and other things... and when I get home... my mom cooking... preparing for her son to return. A quick hug and kiss, it was good to hug her, and it seemed like things were back in their place. After settling a bit, as much as one can settle with such a drastic change, it was dinner. My dad, mom, and I, the table rearanged a bit from when I was last here permanently, but a nice hearty meal, with stir fried veggies, corn soup, a nice bowl of fried rock shrimp, and a beef and vermicelli dish that I have no idea what to call but is comfortingly familiar. I was home.

This morning, I found myself a bit lost. I was home... I stepped outside... smoking a cigarette. It had just snowed... a light frosting of the grass and sidewalks. The streets had already been cleared at this point. How nice it was to return and have an immediate snow. I wanted more... for the trees to be doused in snow... hanging icles weighing down on the branches... and flutters of snow obliged ... but not to the same vision. It was refreshing but also reminded me that Hawaii... well it seemed like a dream. Hawaii was so far away, warm beaches, peoples on the street, the sunshine, the mountains, the sound of the ocean... it was all surreal. Was I even there? Only a few can prove testimony of my stay in Hawaii... but I know I was there. And now... here... without any real purpose of being in New Jersey... i wondered what I was doing here... was it a mistake to leave... I soon realized that I will soon be leaving here. I should enjoy this while I am still here... for soon it will be like Hawaii... a dream... as if I was never here.

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